Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Alas, luck smiles at me!


Dear readers, I will be gone next week. I am on my way to the UK to claim the £750,000 I won in an electronic email raffle by Compaq. Yes, Tracey I will finally meet your family!

I am the luckiest person in the world!

The truth is, this is not the first time I have won such a raffle. I also won £750,000 from Siemens the other day, and £500,000 from Google last week, not to mention the £400,000 from Motorola’s MEGA JACKPOT earlier this month. I also won a few more lotteries from other overseas companies, but they are written in foreign languages, so I am currently studying Italian and German so I can claim them as well.

Since I started blogging, it seems luck has been on my side, and I keep winning more money than I have ever imagined possible. I am so blessed! I cannot thank the heavens enough for this incredible fortune...(tears almost visible)

On Monday, I am on my way to Liverpool, England to claim my money. ( Is that anywhere near you, Amy?) All I need to do now, I was told, is to deposit P50,000 to an offshore account as a transaction fee, as well as another P50,000 in miscellaneous fees.

Unknown to my three boys, I sold all our cows, pigs, goats and chickens (and their eggs) to come up with the amount. But I was still short of P30,000, so I offered my dying uncle’s kidneys to a nephritis patient to make up the difference.

My children will be so surprised when I tell them the good news.(giggles and more giggles)

No, I have not yet claimed my other prizes. I reckon that after I claim the £750,000from Compaq, I shall have more than enough money to claim my other prizes: Siemens has asked me to give them P200,000 in transaction fees, while Google and Motorola are asking for P150,000 each.

Do not worry, dear reader, these fees are a pittance compared to what I will be getting in return. Life is really good to me, and I remember with shame the many times in my life when I questioned my faith in the heavens.

I will be a rich woman the next time we meet!

15 comments:

The Acolyte Tao said...

Wow, nice, way to go!

Odette Bautista Mikolai said...

TAT,
...one day, i will pay this forward by making one lucky email address the sole beneficiary to my fortune.

(i bet you too had received an email from a nigerian wanting to give away his inheritance. i am just poking fun at all those scam emails i recieved, hahaha!)

Angry American said...

Ummmmmmm...ok.

Odette Bautista Mikolai said...

Angry American,
i just got another call from them and it seems i need to pay another P10K as service charge. we'll i'm thinking of selling my cat and her kitties and maybe a niece and a nephew...
don't worry when i get the money, you'll have plenty of cheeseburgers!

Anonymous said...

Beware of internet scams... sounds like your falling for the oldest trick in the book....

Ed

Odette Bautista Mikolai said...

Ed,
of course not, this post was meant to produce some laughs. like i said, i am merely poking fun at these scams...

i don't even open those emails, you goof!

Tracey said...

Ha ha ha ha...that's better I needed a good laugh, At first I was excited! Second paragraph I started laughing!!!!!!! Can't believe any body took this serious! Fabulously funny Odette.
Love Tracey x x x

Odette Bautista Mikolai said...

i know it will excite you...but oh, if only it can be true, no?
so how is your page going? have you finally figured out how to return to the old page?

Tracey said...

Good morning Odette! I have indeed seen your pictures and left a comment....They are absolutely beautiful, and yes I too hate the background on my blog, but it was the first on the list to try!
Tracey x x x

Prez said...

Congratulations! I'm so excited for you!

Odette Bautista Mikolai said...

PoE,
oh with so much money, i just might pass by Chennai, hahaha!

Can i bring you something?

MEDICALBOOBOOS said...

lol that's so funny!!! Blimmin spammers aye!!!
If you do ever win that amount of money please come to visit Fi and I in N.Z :)
xoxoxoox

The Acolyte Tao said...

Ohh, I misread, haha, I thought it was like something you entered in thought yourself. -.-
Epic fail.

bubble said...

Really funny Odette!

and yes....i have changed my background again lol!

Amy xx

Anonymous said...

yer a goof :)

Ed

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