Thursday, June 18, 2009
Walking in the dark with pain.
Pain is extraordinarily hard to deal with.
I cannot even imagine Amy's pain when her endometriosis starts to act up. Or Kirst's, when the bladder stone which should have been removed long ago had continued to wreck havock in such frail body. Or Joey and Rattle's brittle asthma which makes even the simple act of breathing excruciating at times. And Marion, despite the severe pelvic pain, tries to withdraw the use of the pain numbing morphine for fear that it will do more harm to her in the long run. There's also Sid, who's taking meds for his heart and blood pressure but the side effect of which, is the nagging pain in his wrists that even hitting the key board has become a task too heavy.
They are but few of the people confronted with chronic pain every day, every moment, and who's activity is shaped around constant pain. Oh yes they can whine and complain because it won't dry up my sympathy. However I feel helpless in the face of my inability to do anything about it, upset by it, angered, and a gazillion other complicated feelings.
Pain is something we all go through to a lesser or greater extent. It’s something very difficult to imagine, until you are in it, and can hardly help yourself anymore. It’s something we all know intimately, especially mothers who had gone through childbirth. Damn I even told myself the first time that I won't go through it twice! Yes it’s so hard to describe and write about. It’s hard to push beyond “it hurts” and not wallow in it
But I also understand that with chronic conditions, however, being treated as an invalid just gets annoying. Especially when people give you unsolicited advice - "stop the morphine", "exercise!", "Don't think about it" or other lame ignorant remarks. Those people I have mentioned above don't even look ill as chronic pain is a hidden disability, therefore they are completely overlooked by society and expected to keep up with the flow of the able bodied.
Given all these ways pain can affect a person, it’s no wonder that this can lead to depression. Not only are pain and depression two of the most common problems, - they can occur at the same time!
But most of those afflicted of chronic pain want to just suffer in silence. I guess most of us would sometimes want to suffer in silence ourselves. Sympathy and fuss don’t make it easier to be in chronic pain. A massage, a cup of tea, etc - those things might, though.
Please pray for the sufferers of chronic pain, particularly those who are alone and lonely, and stricken with fears and doubts about how they will survive.