Sunday, June 28, 2009
Freedom from fear.
I believe that everyone, young and old alike, experiences anxieties and fears at one time or another. Of course, feeling anxious in a particularly uncomfortable situation never feels very good. Why, I’m well aware that at the back of my mind, thumping quietly like a drumbeat, are the twin horrors of Guilt and Panic.
Guilt Guilt Guilt Guilt.
Panic Panic Panic Panic.
But I don't want them to over come me and take over. So the trick I’ve learned is simply not to listen. My mind is very well trained like that. But then I realize that this is not the best solution.
I don’t mean fears like the fear of height or spiders or public speaking … although we should face these fears too … I’m talking about fears that I know I should face but just push back anyway, not wanting to deal with them.
I’ve had those horrors of guilt and panic at the back of my mind, many times. I’ve done it with bills — I let the bills pile up, trying to ignore them, not wanting to face them.
I’ve done it with my health, knowing I have cholesterol problem yet, not wanting to think about the things I was eating. I’ve done it with projects that I knew I should be working on, but didn’t want to think about them … because I was afraid, for some reason, to face them. I've done it with bad relationship for fear of hurting people I care about... and many more.
My main fear at the moment is losing my father. Life is so rushed these days I find it harder to make the time for family. One of the things I want to get sorted sooner rather than later is my work/life balance. Then I can get to spend more time with family, my father included.
I guess another word for this fear is worry… it’s a hard habit to kick. Fears have power over me not because they’re so horrible — even if some of them might be kinda bad — but because I allow them to hide in the darkness and intimidate me.
I’m sure you’ve heard it said that there is never a reason to worry. If a problem has a solution, we should start working on the solution (no need to worry.) If there is no solution, we should start working on acceptance (worry won’t help at all.)
We all have fears. There is none among us so brave so as to be fear-free. All throughout our lives, we have to conquer all sorts of fear. There is none among us who is fearless. The fact is that we just fear less as we conquer our fears.
How about you? Do you have fears lurking in the deepest, darkest corners of your mind? Fears you don’t want to face and try to push back?
Then shine some light on those fears.
It’s good to learn to recognize these fears, to become aware of them. They really have power over us when we allow them to fester in the dark, when we do our best not to think about them.
And when you’ve done that, you’ll feel light, relieved, happy.