Friday, November 21, 2008
How do you keep real love alive with the onset of the virtual stage?
Yesterday, I read an article of yet another woman who had decided to dissolve her real life marriage in pursuit of the promise of illusive paradise she feels she’ll find with her online lover.
So what’s the big deal, you say? Why can’t she toss out the old and trade it in for a newer model if she’s convinced it will bring joy to her real life?
Well, I certainly wouldn’t want to deny anyone the opportunity to pursue happiness. But I do have trouble reconciling the knowledge that, when we meet someone in the net, we are only exposed to the person they choose to share with us at any given moment. It’s like he or she wears a metaphoric mask to hide characteristics he or she desires to keep hidden.
We don’t realize this because perhaps subconsciously, we all too often fill in the gaps with images of a lover we project onto them. In essence, we mistake the idea of our lover for the real person themselves and become captivated by this new hybrid of who they are and who we want them to be.
Sadly, many of these married people who pursue cyber relationships are merely groping for a happiness that does not exist in their real life marriages.
And their real life partner has no chance in this unfair fight, since she live with him day in and out. She experience first hand the good and bad attributes that her partner exude every day. From farts and fevers to pimples and sagging belly, their real life partners are just that - real. Complete with unsavory idiosyncrasies and all.
If only she would just at least construct a foundation of a life with her real life partner, and do it with the full knowledge that the grass, however green, will not always be a bed of roses...