Thursday, October 9, 2008
On my own.
They say that leaving is always painful - maybe, if there is a reason to cling to those you will leave behind. But sometimes, you just have to leave because things aren't working out for you at all. Not that we didn't try, but maybe we just can't stay together anymore.
Its good that even the kids took it in stride. I could sense that they too felt relief when we finally leave the house. And setting foot to our new abode give me and the kids a new leash of life. The new environment and people didn't dampen our spirit, even when the house is smaller compare to the one we had to give up. It just made me realized how needlessly I hold on to the relationship just because I don't want to be branded a "separada". Having a support from my family allow me to take that bold step. I left with nary a longing nor bitterness.
I just hope that the separation will do good to him as well as he doesn't have to measure up to our expectations anymore. Maybe that's what causing him to drown his frustrations in alcohol.
An end only allows a beginning of a new one. I just want to live in my present and leave the past in the past.I like my new autonomy and freedom now and I look hopefully to my future.