Saturday, January 10, 2009
For men only.
When your wife or girlfriend asks, "Honey, have I put on weight?" you know that this is the end of your natural life. The said question is probably the trickiest of all the trick questions that women throw at their unsuspecting spouse or boyfriend.
And there are more....
* Which dress looks better on me? ( Just buy both dress, credit card bills be damned.)
* What happened at the stag party last night? ( Do NOT break the code of silence.)
* Do you find other woman attractive? ( Do not answer even if she claims she will not get angry. Answering this question is tantamount to remaining celibate for an undetermined period of time.)
* What would you do if i die? ( She is trying to gain sympathy, shoot yourself instead and make her pity you.)
And men, when women ask you these questions, steel yourselves. Do not run away. A friend tried and he was chased down by his girlfriend like a rabid dog. Those are tricky questions which you are only meant to reply to if you are brain damaged or if you would like to be.
They are meant to test both your loyalty and fidelity to a relationship.
But nothing tops the most devastating question : Am I fat?
It has also evolved into questions such as: Does this dress makes me look fat? Have I put on weight? Are you losing circulation when I sit on your lap?
Men take note that even if you are suffocating in the folds of her flesh as she takes you into her arm, loss of consciousness would be a more human alternative than a woman who doesn't want to accept that she can only fit into a size 6 in her dreams.
When these questions arises, buy her gifts. She simply want to be assured that you still love her in whatever size she is. Remember that you can recover from bankruptcy but not from castration.
So, what can you say? Am I fat?