Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Of wrecked laptop and struggles.

I am now blogging from home and not from the office as my laptop is on vacation. Haha. Yes, funnier even if you know that a thunderstorm had rendered it useless! That means, I have to stay late at night to read blogs and comment and write responses.

So, this is a private struggle for me which is nothing compared to what my other friends had to deal with. Joey and Amy are struggling with chronic pains, Rattles, of losing her job, Sid with the emptiness of the present, Kirst and Marie, with the burden of an operation gone bad, and Ray's fear of a recurring cancer. All private. All personal. All uniquely and singularly theirs.

Me, Tracey and Fi and the rest of you can only look on caringly, of course, but there’s little else we can do. Yes we give support, but we cannot possibly know the cost of every step they take. It is not our arms that are heavy, not our legs that have gone to lead, nor our knees that are weak. Yes we cannot even possibly take the pain away because the pain cannot be taken away, nor eased because it simply cannot be eased. In fact, some of us may never sense the pain they go through, the hurt, the bitterness, so we despise it or ignore it - but it doesn’t quite matter which... the effects are all the same. In the end, struggle is private.

But struggle is a fact of life. What we struggle against, what we struggle for, what we struggle with, they all test and hone us. It is the resistance itself that makes us strong. The great choice with which struggle confronts us, is not whether to accept it as struggle comes without conditions. It doesn’t matter whether we accept it. The choice is whether to crumble under it or to brave it.

Struggle however is but a necessary gift. Of course, it is not a gift which, at first sight, we want! Any serious struggle is a call to recognize that life is full of gifts that come and go, come and go as we ourselves come and go through the many stages of living.

It is the grace of discovering that our lives are more than any one event and that we, not fate, are really what will determine what the rest of our lives will be like.

I know I'll be struggling without my laptop for days. But what the heck!


rattles said...

Hi Odette

Sorry to hear your laptop isnt working thats frustrating- i blew mine up last year and my desktop malfunctioned a month or so back so ive been using my mobile phone for internet access and blog access-nightmare :-)

My new notebook computer should (i say should) have arrived this morning - it didnt! I called vodafone only to be told they forgot to order the courier so its now arriving tomorrow morning instead! Least the end is in sight hey? :-)

I hope your well! On the subject of struggles there is a fabulous quote from the bible- the book of romans i think which my friend read to me last year whilst i was in intensive care that goes something like this...

....we rejoice in our sufferings knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope...

By suffering and enduring things that are sent to test us we develop into the people we are. How you deal with the hand of cards your dealt in life is your own individual choice-you can let it crush you or you can use it and build with it making your foundations stronger.

I try and live everyday to the fullest of my ability and try to never take a single moment for granted. Every second is so precious and we are all lucky to have a great world in which we live and share with each other.

Speak soon and Lotsa lv Rattles Xxxx

Amy said...

What a lovely post...you really are understanding and a fantastic person...thanks Odette.

Sorry about your laptop lol...they are nightmares at times!! :)

big hugs xxxx


My laptop is my husband, so if he crashed and died I would be lost without him. Fi and I both would crumble without our beloved technology. For me the laptop is my solace, my way to be able to socialise and not have to hide the pain, it is my comfort and strength when weak, as I can chose laughter or research as a way to escape, my empathies are with you on losing your laptop. Each person loss or struggle is their own and everyone deserves understanding despite what they may be struggling with.
You are so kind hun and I know your strong too.
Love Kirst

Odette said...

you are an admirable person- strong and resilient. despite your chronic illness, you view life as a series of opportunities or event to be appreciated for what they are. Yes you are right, there is purpose in every moment, if we only seek it out.
i just wish things will go your way, but if they didn't it's only because there's a better opportunity ahead. i know everything will work out fine in the end.
just know that you are not alone in your battle, ok? you have a community here that is cheering you on.

Odette said...

after knowing you guys, i have stopped whining and complaining. my struggles are nothing compare to yours. just being pain-free ( altho having pms is a pain i have to endure) is already a blessing so everything else is bearable.
much love,

Odette said...

oh we seems to be writing at the same time. it's 5:40 am here. see, i even have to get out of bed early so i can respond, hahaha!
maybe i should get my coffee now...

Mimi said...

Hi Odette,
I am so sorry to hear about your laptop. Computer problems are what frustrate me the most!
As for struggles, I have many. Who doesn't? I do try and remind myself that compared to others, I live the Good Life and am very blessed. I choose to believe that God is testing me and that I'll pass the test. I'm trying!

Tracey said...

You are a lovely person. Wonderful post!

I have been thinking......as we are both 47 this year you really should come on Sunday so we can celebrate together!!!!!!!!!!

Love Trace x x x

rattles said...


Thankyou so much for your kind words and encouragement its very much appreciated and it spurs me on to continue my fight for justice despite feeling poorly most of the time.

Life is such a precious gift and so many people take it for granted i hope that i can live life to the full and make the most of every opportunity-i try - dont always succeed but that passage always makes me stop and think.

Thankyou for being so inspiring odette your a really great person and im glad i know you.

Speak soon and take care lotsa lv Rattles Xxxx

Angry American said...

Thank you. That was a wonderful post. However, besides cancer, I also spend each day hoping my car won't die. All the reparis it needs now cost more than it's worth.

As far as my pc, I have to smack myself every time I boot up cause I wanna go spend more money to upgrade it when I don't need to. lol

amna said...

hi odette, the way you write, that poor thing really needs vacation, hahaha. hope you'll have it soon so that your writing schedules will be back to normal. as for me, i'm not a laptop person, i am not comfortable with it, so it's either office and home pc or my blackberry, anything else except laptop. i used to carry laptop but i had it in my car trunk , unused. my cell phone is my mini computer, has internet,ym,map and navigator,etc., and i can hook up to printer. almost same function as pc. and pretty handy but with one big fall out..more costly.

I guess if we don't have struggles, life can be boring and meaningless. We can't value what we have unless we struggle for it, as the saying goes, "easy come, easy go".

Odette said...

yes we all struggle privately, some more than others. but we somehow survive becoz god gave us strength to cope all these.
w/o it, we won't be living life...
hope you have a pleasant day.

Odette said...

at least you have something to tinker there with! hey, i like the beach house and the texture you have used.
can you also change the furniture fabrics? ok ok ok...i know you are pulling your hair there again! hahaha

Odette said...

youre right. my laptop does need a vacation, or maybe a new one?
see, you are just as dependent as i with the worldwide web! even from your car you still get connected, hahaha.


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