Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Life, imitating art.
There was one time, fairly recently, when I pretty much decided to just stay in bed for the rest of my life. Nothing seemed urgent enough for me to have to get up and dress for.
Thinking about it, this didn’t happen because nothing was urgent enough. No, quite the opposite, actually. I think too many things were too urgent so that my system just upped and decided to go AWOL. I know this is a bit weird, because I am just a lowly plant employee. It’s not like the fate of the Philippine economy depends on me or anything. I know there shouldn’t be that much pressure on me who’s main duty in life consists of formulating lubricants for diesel and gasoline engines.
And yet, there I was. And I think it’s not an experience unique to me. I admit to having thought that I am living life in anticipation of going from one heart-stopping moment to another. After about four decades of being here, I have realized that it generally doesn’t work that way.
I blame Hollywood for that expectation or my habit of watching a movie marathon on weekends. Why shouldn’t I, when in the span of a feature film, people are born and they die. They get married and have kids, get into gangs wars and in and out of jail. I’ve seen movies where, within the film, a whole novel is finished in two hours tops, while it takes me a day just to write a blog – and that’s when I’m on a roll!
So here I am now waiting for the big cheesy Hollywood moment.
The big drama.
The great bow with an auditorium full of people cheering me on, or at the very least, somebody looking adoringly at me for saving their lives. I sometimes wish I get theme music as I walk down the streets of Manila. And, why don’t I randomly run into some stranger with a striking resemblance to Hugh Jackman who’ll magically fall in love with me?
I don’t get the big moments often and maybe this makes me sometimes decide to stay in bed for the rest of my life.
I know things don’t always follow Hollywood logic, although sometimes they strangely do, and I certainly don’t look like a Hollywood personality. I am aware though that every now and then my sense of reality should be screwed off, vacuumed, and screwed back on.
Stop laughing, will you?