Thursday, February 19, 2009

Of blogs and friendship.


I am very happy with my blog follower group and more pleased to know that it continue to grow. I think they have to be the most cheerful and supportive group that I have encountered. It's truly a breath of fresh air to see people just hanging out, having fun, learning crafts and supporting one another. Some of those who often write a nice comment in my page had not registered as a follower, but I know they are.

It was only late last year when I started writing a blog due to an urging of a friend. Yes, I sometimes write in a personal fashion, and I love it when people can connect to that. I never anticipated a medium where a written word could be read by so many people... This somehow leads to a sense of familiarity, which is expected, and eventually, a sense of intimacy - like friendship. I know that inside the heart of each regular reader of a weblog are the same feelings we felt when we are developing a friendship.

It is indeed amazing how technology makes people stay so in touch. I could say too that this medium allows people to be curious about other people and we just want to find out so much about them. What also strikes me is how willing people are to be so open about their lives and work. But then this same medium is also ripe for a false sense of intimacy – and friendship being one of them.

I have learned some tough lesson that unfortunately it seems, you only learn by living. Naah, television doesn’t teach it, schools don’t teach it, and if you’re above a certain age, our parents didn’t teach it either. You have to learn it by living, by thinking of someone as a friend, only to find out they don’t think of you as a friend. Of course, it can be devastating, I know, I’ve been there myself.

I learned that a friend is someone I can trust to be with me when I am at my weakest and most vulnerable. And they are people who, no matter how painful it is to see, are willing to be with me when I am so helpless and weak. It’s not about whether you are trustworthy, or whether you are friendly, it’s the actual act of trust that is the basis of friendship. If I trust you to be truthful, then you’re a friend. If I find I must be careful how I say things, then it’s something other than friendship.

I am glad that I have gained imaginary friends whose blogs I read everyday. I have never met these people but we are friends in my mind. These people I have gotten to know through this relationship continue to enrich my life so if you are reading this, you know who you are and why I consider it an imaginary friendship worth protecting.

9 comments:

Tracey said...

I am your imaginary friend!
Lots of love
Tracey
xxx

blue_butterfly said...

Of course you are!
And it worries me why you aren't still in bed at this time???

Tracey said...

I sleep 2 hours a night only! I blog through the night!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxx

blue_butterfly said...

omg, tracey, just two???? damn, i get crancky all day if i sleep less than 8 hours!
i hope you get to sleep during the day...

Tracey said...

Sometimes I nod off for half an hour...if I am lucky!
Tracey xxx

Mar G said...

Hi there - Thanks for visiting my blog & for deciding to follow it :-) I'm still learning & finding my feet with regard to crafting & cardmaking....I'm sure if you wanted to start you would find you do indeed have talent, creativity & patience?!
I've only been blogging since last year & I've been chatting & staying in touch via blogger with some lovely ladies :-)
Look forward to getting to know you & putting a name to a photo?! Lol
Thanks for your comments....TC - Mar x

amna said...

i gained more intimate friends here on the net rather than in my actual socialization outside. i can pour out all my emotions to these imaginary friends whom i have never met. i found out that if i tell my friends about my life then i have to expect the whole community to know,meanwhile with my online friends i don't have to worry that they will spill my story, whatever we talk just stays on the pc, anyway what's there to tell, they don't really know the real me, how do i look like, where exactly i live, etc. etc. but i got my comfort sharing my emotions and pains with them. i just had a painful marriage fallout after 17 years, i told one friend , the next time i went to a party, everybody were asking how i was coping..was so shocked. i was inside the toilet when i overhead women i just saw for the first talking about me, wondering how could a husband cheated such a lovely wife and etc. i stayed inside almost in tears.
anyways odette, i'm your regular follower, i have your blogsite listed in my favorite. i'm not a blogger myself but i love reading interesting blogs aside from joining debate forums. i can say that you have gone far in the field of bloggings, keep it up!

blue_butterfly said...

marion,
i would be very pleased to journey with you as well and get to know you in the process. so buckle your seatbelt and enjoy the ride!

blue_butterfly said...

amna,
you are very right! and i appreciate that you follow my blog.
you know, my oldest friends have invariably also become part of my online community as we have moved to different locations. but being in front of the pc most of my waking hours had allowed me to meet great people whom i get to communicate via emails and chat and now blogs.
but like in real life, sometimes they just vanished with nary a word as to why they chose to stay away. it does hurt, esp. when we have invested so much emotion into the relationship. but life goes on and we continue to meet new people along the way. then the pain somehow lessen in time. that is life's lesson 101.

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