Saturday, August 15, 2009
Pls. explain the science of romance.
How we fall in love may be the hardest human behavior to explain. We can't explain why we feel inspiring sense of tenderness toward a person who sparks our interest. Or why we get an uplifting feeling of relief and reward when the interest is returned.
I think we human beings make a terrible fuss about lot of things but none more than romance. Oops, let me correct that, I know eating and drinking is important for keeping the species going- more so actually, since a celibate person can at least continue living, while a starving one can't. Yet, while we build a whole society around the simple ritual of eating, it never turn us flat-out nuts. Romance does.
Imagine just how people compose poetry, novels, movies, sitcoms for love. They even live for love, die for love, kill for love. Love seems stronger than the drive to stay alive. So what I and maybe the rest of you want to know is, Why? What makes us go loony over love?
The problem with romance also is that it doesn't always deliver the goods. For all the joy it promises, it can also play us for fool, particularly when it convinces us that we've found the right person, only to be disappointed later. It seems any overwhelming emotional experience that ratchets up our sensory system can distort our perception, thus allowing us to take a chance on someone we should have avoided.
So, why do fools fall in love? And when we do fall, why do our faculties of reason - and decency and self respect and even right and wrong - sometimes not come along? I am aware of those who has ended with an obsessive, possessive and even dangerous partners, yet for some reason they stick around - often at their own peril.
I know we can't precisely measure love, but we can't deny that it comes in different temperatures: cool, hot and scalding.