Moving forward.

I believe that all of us are the product of our life's experiences. We are the character that has made us. We are what our childhood forced us to be. We are what our teenage experiences convinced us to be and we are what our adult life allowed us to be.

I don't mind what other people say about my life because only I own my life.

At the same breath, my life is always moving forward. We are always moving forward in life whether we acknowledge it or not. This is one constant that will never change.

And all is perfectly unfolding, and taking place in the right time, and in the right place.

I had chosen to move along with life even if in doing so I would hurt and disappoint some people. My decision had altered theirs, and it left a bad taste in their mouth. But sometime I have to set out my pursuit of something which never really was my objective to begin with. It so happen that half way down the road, opportunity present itself.

This is my one shot at life and I grabbed it.

I owe some people a lot of gratitude for the support they have given me in the past and I own that indebtedness. It is very sad that they do not understand the choice I had made even if it doesn't directly affect their life situation right now.

I cannot give up and spend the rest of my life grumbling about missed opportunities. Besides this is my life and I have to take charge and set out to achieve what will make me happy. The choice is all mine. I have no control over the past, but I still have the freedom to make choices for the future. I cannot wait for things to change on their own. I have to move them if I have to.

I regret having hurt the very people who I thought would be happy to see my life turn to the better. I hope they see my point of view. But I cannot dwell on negativity. Life is way too short to keep going down a negative road to nowhere.

If I fast forward to the last day of my life and I am in the last moments here on Earth and remember all the times I could have pursued an opportunity and chose not to for one reason or another. How would that make me feel?

Pretty rotten, huh?

Regret is the pain of realizing we could have done something and chose not to. There is no pain greater than the pain of regret.

PS:
Oh, just to make things clear, I did not have a baby or adopted one. This is just a photo taken last Sunday during Denica's christening ceremony.

Car show.

This has been an exciting day for me because Ken brought me to Iowa to see a car show!

Ok ok, you say, "what's fun with that?"

Let me explain...

Lets start from the Mecum Classic Car Auction show from cable channel that Ken love to watch.

You see, it also peaked my interest because I don't understand the logic on how so many people wanted to buy "old" cars. Oh, by the way, a classic car is a car that is at least 25 years old, still in mint condition and considered collectible item, or at least that's how I understand it. They really look stunning, but I know for a fact that these cars has no fuel efficiency, they don't have warranties and not better for the planet because of the smoke they emit.

BUT! and this is a big but, they have soul, charisma and the memories that go with it. So from that alone I can speculate why people love those cars from the 60's or early 50's. It was an era when cars had personality. So each Saturday night Ken and I would sit in our living room gawking at those wonderful cars on parade and watching people bid on them.

Yesterday he told me that there is a car show in Joice, Iowa, which is just an hour drive from Wells. He asked if I wanted to go check it out. Of course, I said YES!

Omg, I was already feeling giddy as soon as I saw numerous cars lining up the main street of the town. I even wanted Ken to park on the first open spot he could find, but he keeps driving around and I was getting restless! He finally saw one right across the local library. The reason he parked there is so he can use the building's toilet, haha!

another OMG!!!

Those cars on display there are very rare birds indeed. You never see them around anymore. The powerful machines along with its clean line would dwarf all the other cars on the road.

Yes, while it is true to say that a classic car does not have some of the more modern technology that most look for in a vehicle, they however more than made up for being part of automotive history.

Kudos to the owner of those cars who keep them in shape.

Where are they?

I am saddened that most of those blogs I have followed had been dormant or had been deleted by the owner.

I know that anyone who writes reaches a point when it becomes difficult to continue. It could be writer's block or a writer's change of interest.

It happened to me a lot as well.

Life happens.

Things change.

But somehow my the blog remains. Blogging was never something I thought I would do. Come on, why would anyone want to read what I have to say about just random things?

Yet somehow writing a blog is like keeping a journal of my thoughts and feelings. It's similar to keeping a diary of sorts. It is a simple way of storing all the things that interest and excite me.

I admit I don't write as often as I use to but writing if I find a time, help me organize my ideas. And reading my old posts allow me to look at my life as a third party and not a participant.

I like reading other people's blog because their life also interest me. Besides I feel intimately close to them by being in the front seat in their life's journey. That's why seeing those blogs fold up is like losing a friend.

Hope you guys will come back and start writing again.

Just another birthday!

Untitled

I can't believe I'm almost half a century,
It happened awfully fast
They say I'll have 49 candles
But I know I'll just have a blast.

I'm not prone to dance and sing,
But I know I'll have a great time
Just think, I have so many memories
I can do it all again in my mind.

I'll celebrate in spite of my age
I'm happy to still be here,
I'm glad I can still walk, and talk
I've had a good long life, you hear?

My hair is not yet white, some wrinkles here and there
But they bring me respect and love
Getting old isn't as bad as you may think
I have blessings from Heaven above.

I have family who love me forever
No matter how old I get
And friends who still respect me
And I don't have a single regret.

So please don't feel sorry for me
I'll still have so many good times,
I have so much to be thankful for
I'm just glad to be forty nine.

The End

I'm learning to drive!

Unlike most Americans, who were encouraged to learn to drive as soon as they could reach the pedals and stay behind the wheel (not necessarily sitting!), I didn't get the opportunity to start learning to drive until now - out of necessity.

I am forty eight years old.

You see, living in the Philippines without a car could never be described as a genuine inconvenience. If a bus was missed there would soon be another; or a jeepney, or a motorcycle with a side car we call tricycle or one could take the metro rail transit to just about anywhere in the Greater Metro Manila area, with no worries.

But where I live now, public transport disappear completely like some Bermuda triangle-like phenomenon whisking them away to another dimension.

A real problem. But the solution was easy - learn to drive!

Ok, since I consider myself a reasonably intelligent person, I convinced myself I will pass the test. And sure enough with only four errors I acquired my permit and the right to drive with a licensed driver.

The first time I sat in front of the steering wheel I feel as if I could go into a panic attack. My breathing is shallow and my body stiff. But it helps to have a patient instructor like Ken beside me. He would patiently remind me to buckle up, adjust the seat and the mirrors before I start the car. I would drive about 50 miles per hour, which was pretty close to the speed limit in the country roads here. Ken however would keep telling me that I was going too slow and needed to speed up that's because he constantly monitor my speed!

I'm pretty certain I stalled my car on every street corner in my hometown the first time I went around it and Ken kept asking me to just drive him to the emergency room. But just to make this clear, Ken never appeared to get anxious or angry at any mistakes I made. We would cruise around wherever I pleased which made driving with him a lot of fun. Unlike a driving instructors, who I guess would generally give me specific directions when it came to what streets I could drive on.

Ken let me decide where I wanted to go. He was almost pleasant. Which is scary in its own way. Haha.

For now I dreaded the thought of driving in the city because I know I would be praying for streetlights to remain green for me - always.

Did I tell you I haven't practiced parking and backing up?

But with the State Government shutdown, it will be a while before I could get my road test and a driving license. I'll just cruise idly for now...

Addicted to pizza.

Am I a pizza lover?

No.

At least that's what I thought, till Ken introduced me to bake-your own-pizza from this nice and cozy little shop buried in a city nearby.

Now, every Friday evening is pizza night and I love pizza as much or more than I do spaghetti and meatballs. Yes, you read it right, e v e r y f r i d ay.

Cost or travel doesn't matter as all our mind can think of is our date with a pie from heaven. It all started one Friday, months ago, when Ken asked me if I would like pizza for supper. I turned to him with a surprised look, because I never thought pizza could be anything but a snack food! But when I saw the large pie with all the toppings on it, I knew I won't have to slave in the kitchen that evening and there will be less dishes to wash, so I said YES without batting an eyelash.

I have had pizza before but I can only tell you that I really couldn't say enough about how good that first bite was, and stayed that way to the very last.

What's unique with this pizza is it is a "take and bake". They assemble our pizza while we watch and we can then take it home and bake it ourselves for that hot, fresh-baked taste.

But that's not all. I would always add more stuff to it before putting it in the oven. I'll sprinkle more green peppers, onions, mushrooms, pine apple tidbits and lots of cheese. Sometimes I would add meat around the dough so it won't burn as we would always order the thin crust.

Yummy!

Cheap treasures.

Talk about a treasure hunt?

Only one place will always come to my mind - thrift store!

Looking in thrift stores is an ultimate thrill. I always go in looking for anything cool, fun and edgy. Sure it can be a bit overwhelming seeing so many things all at once.

Yeah, I know any classy department store have the same effect, except this one doesn't make you spend more.

I would normally start at one rack and slowly work my way down the other. But who ever said that searching for treasure was easy?

But it become easier if I go with my favorite shopping buddy. I always go with my mom or our friend Linda. Of course it's not always that I find stuff I want, but there have been other times when I found the piece of my dreams. I found this one wallet which has never been use because it was still wrapped in its original paper and I have been looking for one where I can put all my cards and what-nots.

When I do find something I love, it is like it was waiting for me all along.

I can't wait for my next hunting expedition...